Question

How to spank my husband?

I've known my husband was turned on by being spanked for years now (please no judgments - I'm past that and want to be supportive of his needs). But spanking wasn't my thing, so I guess I haven't really indulged him like I could have (a few spanks over my knee as foreplay). I know he would like more, but it hasn't been easy to discuss. Can some of you give me some suggestions on what he might like as an anniversary surprise?

I know he likes being over my knee and I have a feeling my hand on his bare butt hasn't really been sufficient. Any ideas on an object to spank with? I know that more of a role play would please him, so I'd love suggestions on what to wear or say to him that would turn him on. This sounds so weird, but since I don't really understand the source of his fetish, I (innocently on the face of it) asked his mom how she used to discipline him. Turns out she only rarely gave him a quick smack on the seat. Nothing more than that, but I still have the feeling he craves the naughty boy treatment though.

Constructive suggestions from couples who have experience would be great. Thanks.

Answer

_ Page 1

Here's something to consider: Spanking has 3 sensory elements that contribute to it being a turn on. First is the pain and surprise of spanking. Even done lightly, there's a tingling sensation to the skin and the "sudden surprise" of it that makes it stimulating. The other thing is the sound of a spanking. That "smack" sound of the hand or object coming in contact with bare butt skin. The combination of the sudden and unexpected hit, the tingling sensation, and the sound of a spanking is very erotic in the right setting. I'd say that when you're doing the spanking experiment with these 3 elements and see what makes it so hot for him. Does he like the pain? Spank him hard. Does he like the sound? Spank him continuously but not hard so the sound is there. Does he like the surprise? Spank him once then wait awhile and distract him with something else and then wallop him when he least expects it. Once you determine what sensory elements he likes it'll be easier to role play to meet his needs. The good part is that it may lead to other ideas to experiment with. (ie, if he likes pain, he may like biting or pinching or having you rake your nails down his back etc.)

Jun 15 at 12:7

I have a lot in common with your husband. I think it is really cool that you want to surprise him with a real spanking.

For what it is worth, I like being over my wife's knee when she is wearing a skirt and pantyhose. A little scolding followed by the hairbrush is a huge turn on. It sounds like a "mommy spanking" might do it for him too. Just start out slowly and increase the impact.

Jun 15 at 15:53

sorry cant help u on that one .just like if a woman likes to be treated like a slave or being spanked herself or chains or whips if any women that i know that were into that who ever was the person doing that to them god save them because they will be hurt buy me that gets me soooooooooo grrrrrr

Jun 15 at 20:2

start with a soft spank with a spatula. make it soft and if he wants it harder than SMACKHIS AZZ BECAUSE HE LOVES IT

Jun 16 at 0:34

Just rip his pants off and have at it.

Jun 16 at 5:30

You get a star in my book. good for you exploring some of your husbands fantasy's. Maybe dress up as a principal, you know the hard woman principal...or a lady police officer. You can find some of these sexy outfits online or at an adult store. Probably online would be better. Adameve.com is an adult site that will ship you things of all kinds in discreet packages. Look around on there...it might give you some ideas. and again....Good job keeping up with him.

Jun 16 at 10:48

There are all kinds of whips and floggers one can buy for such occasions...or how about having him point you to some fetish sites (that he likes) that show spanking so you can get an idea of what he might like and how he might like it...

We can't tell you if he'd like to see you dressed as a dominatrix, a school teacher, or like "mom" to punish him...if he'd prefer a whip, flogger, paddle, or something else...you'll have to glean from him what he likes or would like to try...after all, it's his fetish...

Happy spanking! ?

Jun 16 at 16:29

I' d say check out his browser history :) ( just remember, fantasies and reality are of course two different things and what he thinks he wants might not really be what he wants) That and simply ask him pointed questions about what is fantasy spanking would be. Make him be detailed, what kind of shoes? Dress or pants? etc. What type instruments does he see in his fantasies? You might even ask him to collect a box of implements/toys he thinks he would like you to use on him and leave them for you. Also, does he seek a "fun" spanking? A disciplinary spanking? Important to know if he is looking for a light, medium or heavy spanking and whatever you do, discuss it the day after. Find out, was it too hard, too light or just right? Communication is the key and he has probably done a very hard thing for him to begin with in even broaching the subject with you. I too have to say its great you are looking for information on the subject instead of condemning him for his kink. Good luck!

Jun 16 at 22:33