Can someone explain this to me-- concerning the male psyche?

Majority of the men I have dated have acted and verified this to me..

I just would like to understand why


Why is it that when men look at women in media-porn-or even in passing... its always the strikingly gorgeous women that they enjoy.. mention.. (even can be very critical of)

but when it comes to dating.. you see them with average.. or even normal women?

This confuses me in a big way.. seems contradictory as well..


I understand that there are always exceptions to this.. BUT it seems to be a very common trend in my experience.


call me boring but I find this confusing because I am quite opposite from this.. what I find attractive in real life... I also find attractive in other contexts----


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I'll take a shot answering your question.

Everybody is attracted to gorgeous members of the opposite sex. Some of us would never ask a "Gorgeous" girl out ..because we actually ( privately ) feel inferior and not worthy of being in the company of such a beauty. We don't like rejection, and so we lower our sights just a little, and look for a "friendly" gal who will talk to us.

There's a bigger reason too. "Gorgeous" people, know that they are gorgeous. They act snooty, tend to be spoiled, and aways seem to be attracted only to the most popular guys & gals. Because they are gorgeous, they CAN go with whom ever they want to, and they want to go with the guy who has a motorcycle, car or lifestyle that we can't compete with. Generally speaking, these guys and gals are spoiled rotten, get what they want, and are shallow & self-centered. ( Not attractive traits for a mate, wife, or permanent partner.) Most of us would prefer to have a partner who is loving, trustworthy, giving, and kind, than a "Trophy". Since usually the gorgeous people are brats who rely on their looks and popularity to get what they want, Those of us who prefer "Quality" relationships have to look elsewhere to find the traits that we truly admire. That doesn't mean that the gorgeous people are any less attractive, we still recognize good looks, but we prefer to be with a simple, honest, loyal partner.

When ones partner is attractive, he/she will always attract attention. Other people will always be nearby to hit on our partner. Whether in church, work, or shopping, when we are not there, we know that others are leering, drooling, and fantasizing about our partners. Whenever we turn our heads, somebody who is attracted to her will attempt to win her attention and affection. It's not jealousy, it's just a fact. Some people DO get jealous, and they are miserable every time that their gorgeous partner is not with them. Some are proud of their "arm candy" and love it when other people want what they have. It's a badge of superiority over others.

Most of us just don't want the hassle of dealing with a self-centered twit, because down deep we know that No matter how good and how perfect she looks right now, some guy, some where is sick and tired of her $hit.

My wife and I have been married 38 years. She's not "Gorgeous", and the lord knows I'm no Prince Charming either, but we are happy. We have raised a strong, secure family, we trust each other, we love each other, and we are comfortable together. I still see attractive girls everyday, ( I'm old not blind and stupid ) and I'm sure she glances at a cute guy from time to time, but we are a team. Stronger together than apart, and we are happy. To our way of thinking there's nothing wrong with that.


Well gorgeous women can be hard to get. Also, a lot of them are quite arrogant, so they just aren't worth all the stuff many men have to put up with to date them.

I have gotten women who I thought were out of my league before, but I also acknowledge that dating someone is about dating the person, not just their body. Just like women, men want a *person* we're attracted to. We take in the big picture and either we find it attractive or we don't. The big picture includes personality, body language, life decisions, and yes, looks. There are times when a woman with a less attractive body can have a great personality that makes her more attractive than a girl with a great body but crappy personality.

I really don't think this is any different for men or women. To be honest, I don't quite understand why you don't understand it.


Speaking for myself, I enjoy all types of women when it comes to porn. Well that is as long as she's not over 140 lbs.


What kind of question is this? How does this relate only to men? Women don't fantasize about men they see on screen? Are you freaking kidding me?


Because "average women" is all those men can afford

The more wealthy the man is the higher his chance of nailing a hot chick.


There are only so many strikingly beautiful women around. If they could have them in real life, of course they'd have them. What man in his right mind would turn down a hot girl who is nice to boot?


I think it's because these types of men are scared of rejection so they essentially "settle" in real life. But they will continue to admire women who they will never have the chance to be rejected by.


lets say 1/100 women are strikingly gorgeous. and say men are 50% of the population (they're not however doesn't really matter) that means it is mathematically impossible for men to all date gorgeous women. This means they have the choice of being forever alone or taking what they can get.