Question

How should I comfort my aunt?

Her husband died a few years ago and left her with nothing. She has beaten cancer twice, but it just came back for a third time, and the doctors say she won't live more than 3 years. For the past two night she has come to me crying and saying she's so sorry she wasn't there for me when my parents got divorced. I hate seeing her like this and I just don't know what to do?

Answers

Just put your arms around her and tell her that you love her no matter what, that anything she has ever done or thinks she has ever done to anyone cannot outweigh her value to you. That just who and what she is is what makes her precious. Try to get her to understand that you are totally, totally there for her. Now that she knows about how many days she has left, every day is a precious jewel. Tell her not to worry about regrets. Nothing can be changed. Just be thankful for the sunrise. Grovel in it, love everything she can, enjoy every good flavor, every beautiful color, every lovely thing. She is lucky in a way. She has time to say her good-byes and to make peace.

Just tell her that what is important is that she is here. now. And that you love her.

God bless.

#1

just pray for her

#2

She is grieving in some private way. Be as comforting as seems appropriate. Ask her what she wants from you. Do it!

#3

yes, comfort her, she's been through a lot and will need to know that someone is there for her. she's family, family is the most important thing a person can have

#4

Dear Jacob, your aunt has had a very hard journey in these last few years. Faced with this new diagnosis, I'm sure she is evaluating everything that she did in her life and wants to put her "house in order" before she passes on. Part of that involves you and the divorce of your parents.

Here is what you can do for your aunt. Tell her that you appreciate her and love her. Make time to be with her or to call her to see how she is doing. Find out if there is anything that you can do for her to make her life easier...yard work...shopping...going to the doctor with her. The biggest comfort you can be to her is to be with her during this very hard time. You sound like a caring person, and I'm sure this will mean a great deal to your aunt.

#5